the other day I was in tears. the same news came in different form. when a new year was beckoning, a new beginning was to have you.
all I can hang onto are my memories of being a little girl with him.
tears streaming down my face and my heart bursting with so much sadness and a lonely feeling of; why a father "couldn't" be a father a daughter needed. taking care of him after moving out at 15 and having no other parent made me realize a heartache of why I kept hanging on...
after so many isolated tears over years upon years, having your heart ripped out over and over again I have to find solitude when to let go. Let compassion be that of "understanding" and learn to love is to let go. I've been pulling apart for the past few years but there was always that lingering hope, wish...I have so much compassion in my heart for him but I also have compassion for myself and I love myself. I know hanging on just keeps me from moving forward. I know to love myself and let my light bright again is~ releasing all that's toxic...
always in my heart, a part of me I am you
January 4, 2015~ July Jennifer ♥
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